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Sunday, September 20, 2015

The saddest thing about a bitter breakup

I think, one of the saddest things about a breakup besides the
obvious 'broke-my-trust-yada-yada' things is this;

It's that you start forgetting all the nice things about the person you dated. The reason it worked, the things you admired, and loved. Some do it intentionally to come to terms with what they have done (like I don't know, if they are the dumper).

 Like, maybe if they focused on all the negative things about them; or all the hate and disappointment leading to the split and completely DELETED the laughs and love, then they somehow convince themselves that they have made the right choice to ease their guilty conscience existent from having hurt another person tremendously. A person they once loved, whom made their lives a happier place once upon a time. Or they start creating things to have hated . 'How did I not see this before, I was just being used' (even though they might not have been). Again, in the name of easing a guilty conscience.

Others, may do it unintentionally. (like I don't know, if they are the dump-ee)
Like somehow, if they focused on all the bad things, they can convince themselves that their lost love was way below what they deserved and someone out there is going to be on par with all that they deserve. Maybe that's the only consolation they have for themselves, really.

And somewhere in between all that mess, we lose sight of all the peace. All the inside jokes, the places you visited, the clothes you wore to those places, it gets sucked into this void of memories waiting to be sucked into a blackhole, never to be retrieved again. [Sort of like that scene in 'Inside out' where Bing Bong...*nevermind, I don't do spoilers*]

Then when we face them again, we don't see that person as a person anymore, instead--we stare at a pinnacle of discomfort, unhappiness, anger and possibly hate. And that, ladies and gentlemen-- The moment when the love morphs into that discomfort, is the saddest thing.

of course, it does not apply to everyone, because I know a few people who can maintain happy relationships with their exes and it's all fine and stuff.

In fact, I personally don't hate any ex. I could be out sometimes, and I would hear a song or smell something that reminds me of what was, and I don't feel hate. Just smile to myself, and take a deep breath thinking about how everything is reduced to nothing, that's all. Because nobody crosses your path without a reason. Everyone you meet is a lesson. And man did I learn. ;')

P/S: I wish nothing but happiness for you, and if I really loved as much as only I know is possible, then I would rather you stay happy and being the best version of yourself with someone who can make it possible rather than miserable and chained down with me. I can never bring myself to hate.