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Saturday, April 23, 2016

Don't open your mouth if you can't open your mind.

I hate when people proclaim themselves to be open minded but in reality they judge everyone and everything that is different from them, instead of understanding and appreciating that people are diverse by nature.

If someone wears a skirt in public with slightly bigger thighs it doesn't make them an attention seeking ho'.

If someone does not smile at you when you smile at them, they could be having a bad day, or be caught up in their thoughts, they are not stuck up.  If you're only giving smiles so you receive them then you're fooling yourself by thinking you're 'just being nice' cause you are clearly expecting something in return.

If someone wants to try a bold lipstick colour they aren't just doing it for attention. They may want to express their individuality. And that in itself is beautiful.

While the conventional view is that long hair is beautiful, support your ladies if they want to try something new and cut their hair however the hell they want it. It does not make it ugly by fact just because YOU think it is.

If someone is bisexual and is suddenly interested in someone of the opposite gender it does not make them ' coming back to the right path' or 'I'm so happy for you, there is no future if otherwise!'. Accepting someone's sexual orientation means you would be equally happy for them eitherway not deny half of them and only accept the parts of them you like. Then call yourself open minded.

Screw you.

It isn't the bigotry I have an issue with; because that has existed since the dawn of mankind. I have a problem with these same people calling themselves 'open minded'.

Friday, April 15, 2016


Once in a blue moon, my eyes wander in pursuit of a partner in crime.

However, the reality of people eventually leaving is so terrifying it prevents me from taking that leap of faith.
"Oh , Amelia it must be that time of the month again. Shut up, focus on your goals."

And just like that the feeling is dismissed.
But not for long.

Then I see, a cover of some pop song by some couple. They don't sing that well but they seem to really enjoy doing something they like with each other.

Then I see, a toddler walking in the mall, dressed so age-appropriately trendy, hand in hand with her equally fashionable mom , in her early 30s. And I imagine all the ways I would dress and spoil my daughter.

Then I see, a modest couple on instagram. Not the annoying kinds where 90% of post are each other , but views of the beach , an aesthetically pleasing photograph of milo ais in the mamak, the turquoise and black pair of Nikes she'd wear to hike hills, stay-home dates binge-watching sitcoms and the only evidence you have that they were doing those together was from the tags. They don't photograph each other, you just see the view of what they see.

And suddenly, it dawns on me that people accept the reality that nothing is permanent. It scares everyone; yet they make the best of what is already existent before them. The mistake I repeatedly make (and probably will continue to make) is to plan for a future. And live so much in there, that the present feels under-appreciated.

So if an opportunity presents itself now, Would it be time for that leap yet?

"...Amelia, seriously. Your exams are 18 days away. What are you doing."

Saturday, April 2, 2016

I don't care.

There are three kinds of "I don't care".

One where you compose a lengthy rant on a journal, facebook status or an equivalent online platform describing exactly what you  "don't care" about, coupled with a sharing of quotes which capture the essence of empowerment and moving on.

One where you "don't care" because you're so consumed with the idea that karma will serve it's purpose. Correction. Karma isn't enough. Like , You hope karma finds its soulmate, they have a couple of kids, and the multiplicity of karma shows up with a smug face.

Then there's one where, with time,  you don't even care if karma got to serve it's purpose, your thoughts don't wrap around anything regarding  the person who wronged you at all; and you realize that all the energy is better channeled to improving the quality of your own life.

--I think, with age and experience, there will come a point where the two stages are just fast-forwarded and you only feel the third stage in all its glory. Soon, nothing matters as much. And there isn't even a single attributable source it stems from. It's just, the puberty of the previously budding cynicism I guess?